We’ve had a couple of hot days but tomorrow is rumoured to be 20 degrees only (which is honestly a real relief). It’s odd that while I grew up in a tropical country, I don’t actually like the heat anymore – maybe pregnancy has changed me. I used to freeze all the way from March to about September each year, but I actually quite enjoyed my winter and am not sure how I’ll handle the hot dry summer ahead.
And, yes – I can feel the change in the air. I love to hear the wind, especially at night when I’m lying in bed snuggled under the covers. I’m not at the moment, but little Jacob sure is! I’m tempted to play my piano but don’t want to wake him; I would say that Ludovico Einaudi’s music would be fitting. Daniel is listening to Coldplay, which does in fact suit the mood too.
I’m feeling a bit awestruck, nostalgic and grateful at the same time… This is one time that I don’t even need to remind myself how blessed I am – I can feel the joy all around me, reminding me why it’s great to be alive. In fact, I’ll jot down a little poem from the top of my head that sums up how I feel.
Snuggled up on a windy night
With only my lamp alight
Through the trees
With the moon shining so bright.
The winds hush my wandering mind
Not knowing what they might find
A happy smile
A sleeping child
They are certain life’s been kind.
The winds die down; the night is still
There are still spaces to fill
Change is nigh
I’m unsure why
But change I will, I will.
I think I was thinking of Robert Frost’s poetry when I wrote that. I love his poems though – will definitely read them to Jacob when he’s a bit older. But for now, I’ll just let him fool around and be cute.
I know that no day is ever the same. People tell me that he’s grown every time they see him. And sometimes I find that sad because at times, I really want him to stay exactly as he is and never ever change. I know that in any relationship, be it a husband-wife relationship or a mother-son one, things will definitely change with time.
People say that the days are long but the years are short. I hope to hold on to these moments for as long as I possibly can. Though such moments may be fleeting like the wind, love engraves them into stone and they will always be part of me.