April.

Summer never truly arrived, and we are already into autumn. I have to say that this is one of my favourite times of the year because I love seeing the trees cloaked in coats of ever-changing colours, shedding them slowly onto the green grass. I don’t like the impending cold that is about to come, but I have some great memories to keep myself warm.20150322_080336Can’t have Easter without eating some hot cross buns! In all truth, we aren’t really into hot cross buns and Easter eggs; rather, we aim to keep the true meaning of Easter which resonates in the death and resurrection of Jesus. 🙂 20150405_123515During the Easter long weekend, we decided to head out to a kite festival at the beach. We didn’t buy a kite for Jacob but he had an awesome time looking at the kites, watching the steam train chug along and chasing the seagulls. 20150411_111833We had two weddings to go to recently – one was for a Uni friend of mine who was renewing her vows, and another was for Daniel’s cousin. On both occasions, I completely regretted putting Jacob in a white shirt due to the mess he made (though that is his only formal outfit – and you have to admit, the bow tie is cute!). 20150412_110753We took Jacob to the Baby Expo the other day and there was a petting zoo! Jacob loves animals and was squealing and stroking the little animals. He got to try out some Gymbaroo equipment as well, which he didn’t mind but was more interested in running away! 20150413_115946I love school holidays, particularly because we can all get up to mischief as a family! Whether it’s heading out to playgrounds or going shopping or merely sitting at home making a mess, it’s more fun when we’re together! ~~~ I’m having one of those nights where I’m listening to old songs and reading things I wrote a long time ago. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not necessarily sad, more pensive and nostalgic. And I often wonder just how much has changed and how much I’ve changed as a person over the years. One piece of writing that seems to resonate with me tonight is a poem I wrote when I was like 14 or 15. I think it got published in a yearbook or something. I think that I was quite perceptive at this age, but I could also have just been a daydreamy teenager.

My beautiful star
Sparkling, shining, scintillating
Silver and golden embers
Suddenly falls on a night
The whole world remembers
It feels so lost, so sad and hurt
It stumbles upon the lowly dirt
The night is darker than it seems
The star, lost in a schism
Crumbles and fades away
No one knows
How it felt that day
Only me

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Winds of change

We’ve had a couple of hot days but tomorrow is rumoured to be 20 degrees only (which is honestly a real relief). It’s odd that while I grew up in a tropical country, I don’t actually like the heat anymore – maybe pregnancy has changed me. I used to freeze all the way from March to about September each year, but I actually quite enjoyed my winter and am not sure how I’ll handle the hot dry summer ahead.

And, yes – I can feel the change in the air. I love to hear the wind, especially at night when I’m lying in bed snuggled under the covers. I’m not at the moment, but little Jacob sure is! I’m tempted to play my piano but don’t want to wake him; I would say that Ludovico Einaudi’s music would be fitting. Daniel is listening to Coldplay, which does in fact suit the mood too.

I’m feeling a bit awestruck, nostalgic and grateful at the same time… This is one time that I don’t even need to remind myself how blessed I am – I can feel the joy all around me, reminding me why it’s great to be alive. In fact, I’ll jot down a little poem from the top of my head that sums up how I feel.

Snuggled up on a windy night
With only my lamp alight
Rustling leaves
Through the trees
With the moon shining so bright.

The winds hush my wandering mind
Not knowing what they might find
A happy smile
A sleeping child
They are certain life’s been kind.

The winds die down; the night is still
There are still spaces to fill
Change is nigh
I’m unsure why
But change I will, I will.

I think I was thinking of Robert Frost’s poetry when I wrote that. I love his poems though – will definitely read them to Jacob when he’s a bit older. But for now, I’ll just let him fool around and be cute.

20131117_073824I know that no day is ever the same. People tell me that he’s grown every time they see him. And sometimes I find that sad because at times, I really want him to stay exactly as he is and never ever change. I know that in any relationship, be it a husband-wife relationship or a mother-son one, things will definitely change with time.

People say that the days are long but the years are short. I hope to hold on to these moments for as long as I possibly can. Though such moments may be fleeting like the wind, love engraves them into stone and they will always be part of me.